PE or premature ejaculation is generally considered to be a ‘male’ problem and is usually considered the fault of the male too.  Whether it’s something physically wrong, environmentally wrong, or mentally wrong, men shoulder the blame for this problem.  However, can women contribute to this problem as well and thus be digging their own sexual grave when it comes to satisfaction?

Premature Means Different Things

One of the problems with figuring out how to deal with premature ejaculation lies in its definition-there is none.  Being premature is very subjective; what’s fast for one couple isn’t for another one and women especially have different ideas about what constitutes as too fast.  Furthermore these ideas change over time so that where once a woman thought fifteen minutes was too fast, she may now think it’s too slow.  Where most women can agree is that ejaculating in under a minute or two is too fast; but at about the five minute mark, things can get fuzzy and there are even women who consider twenty minutes just too quick.  This ambiguity makes it harder for couples to deal with the issue and leaves a great deal of resentment in the air as well.

High Expectations Gets Low Results

Women can be remarkably catty when it comes to performance in the bedroom and if you think men talk about their bedroom prowess, well you can bet that a woman somewhere is tearing it down again!  Women are conditioned by the media to expect a five star performance every time and they are more often than not disappointed by the refrain ‘I am not a machine!’  However, most men who love their wives/girlfriends want to be able to rock her world at least some of the time and each failure reduces his confidence-not to mention his performance time.

While there’s nothing wrong with high expectations, women cannot expect this of men every single time; after all, there are plenty of times where a woman won’t want to do everything!  Instead of expecting fireworks every time, be supportive and encouraging rather than catty and disappointed and you’ll be more likely to go the distance more often.

Know Thy Man

Some men are naturally long distance runners, others not so much.  If your man has low self esteem, it’s more likely he’ll have premature ejaculation issues.  Instead of taunting, teasing, or acting disappointed every time, women will get better results by being supportive, encouraging and trying out different sexual experiences to try to prolong things.  As the guy feels better about his life, he’ll feel better about his sex, and he’ll be able to go longer. This process can take a while and have some stress and resentment, but it’ll be worth it in the end.

Women may find that part of the reason for the problem of premature ejaculation lies in their own emotional problems, expectations, and outright snippiness.  When a woman conquers these problems and is more confident, supportive and loving, her partner’s abilities will climb back up as well, leading to a better sex life overall.  After all, being in a relationship is all about give and take and if there’s one person only taking, the other one’s going to run out!  Much of the cause of premature ejaculation can come from low self esteem and stress, so by being supportive and having fun, a woman can find that her sex life improves as well.

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